25 Roommates
1:55 p.m. on June 16, 2004

Sam & Lisa: my first true love & his ex-girlfriend in Queens, NY. It turned into a share situation, which ended badly.

My sister, her family & another couple in the Sunset district of San Francisco: The other couple were theater people, very loud & dramatic.

Jacki, Mary Beth & Julie: First real apartment in Haight/Ashbury. Jacki was my best friend from high school. Mary Beth was a hilarious dead head who started dating a heroin addict who would nod off on our couch all the time. Julie was a very pretty blond, who was quite sweet at first, but she hated my cleaning style & thought I did not know that you have to sweep before you mop. It turned out she was an ex-junky, but you never would have guessed it. We all went through the earthquake together. The plaster was cracked on all our walls, but since we were moving out in a few months, our landlord let us draw & paint pictures all over the apartment since he was going to have to redo everything once we left

Laaura & Amy in the Western Addition, SF. Laaura was my oldest friend & Amy was an orphan from Chicago. Her mom died of cancer & six months later her dad dropped dead of a heart attack. Needless to say, Amy was a bit of a wreck. We became very close, but then something snapped. One day when returning home from being out of town, I was greeted by a trashed apartment and blood splattered on all the walls. Amy had a breakdown and came very close to killing herself. She eventually moved in with her girlfriend & Laaura needed to move back home with her parents after being diagnosed with Colitis.

I lived with some hippies for a while before leaving the country.

Chris & his Mom in Portsmouth, England: They took good care of me, feeding me, darning my clothes & driving me everywhere.

My Brother & his friend John in the Sunset district of SF: I kept catching John in the nude watching porn. My brother & I shared a wall that was really just a thin piece of sheet rock. Eventually my boyfriend Brian moved in with us & thus began the embarrassing phase of having to hear my brother have sex with his chick & vice versa.

Brian & I then moved into a South Van Ness Apartment with Joe Franke & his girlfriend Angela. Joe was the creator of a brilliantly hilarious zine called Life is a Joke. One night we dropped acid & the cat talked to us.

Joe and Angela moved out & Carl moved in. Carl was a seriously depressed, fucked up guy that smelled like rot. He had no stuff, so he just slept on his bedroom floor with one of our old blankets.

Eventually Brian & I moved into our own place in the Mission District. When our relationship went caput, I moved into the Duboce triangle with Michael & William. Michael was a Mennonite pack rat who loved to wander the apartment in just his underwear. William was a really nice man who had come in second once on the game show Jeopardy. He had a tendency to have sex with anonymous men in the park.

This is when my friend & I spontaneously moved to Seattle. We shared a one bedroom apartment in the Capitol Hill district. Hangover Sunday's were the best when we would sit around in our robes trying to help each other piece together the night before. After just over a year, she told me she wanted to get a place of her own. I was a little hurt and not sure what I was going to do. I ended up moving into my own tiny studio apartment & was blissfully happy everyday for two years. I then met & fell in love with Sasha who immediately moved in with me.

That is hopefully the last of my roommate stories.

Space Holder. - February 12, 2012

BEAUTIFUL BOY - August 26, 2011

COUNTDOWN - July 13, 2011

SEXAY - June 16, 2011


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