Deep Breathing
10:50 a.m. on June 24, 2004
Well now the anxiety is kicking in. I just booked a round trip to Vegas; Sasha & I are going to get hitched 7/24, our 5 year anniversary. We are still planning on having a big party next year so we can invite everyone we know & woop it up the best we know how. But Vegas is just for us (& maybe 2 dear friends as witnesses if they can make it). We are seriously broke, so even going the cheap Vegas package route is hurting, but what the hell, right? We will be staying in the Stratosphere, the hotel with the roller coaster on the 108th floor, oh yes! I have not been to Vegas since 1986 (before I was old enough to enjoy it) so I am looking forward to the crazy display of excess & glut. But anyway: the anxiety. I am a pretty easy-going, mild mannered sort, but I can get quietly worked up to the point of fretfulness. The manifests itself in two ways: 1. I canít sleep. 2. Charlie horses in the middle of the night. You know, when your calf or neck muscle cramps up all of a sudden and hurts like hell for about ten minutes until you can calm down enough to start deep breathing exercises? Well, that happened last night, first in my left leg and then a few hours later it hit my right leg, now I have to walk like Mr. Tudball. My guess is it will keep happening until after the big event next year or until I can get some X@N@X. Unfortunately I am too shy to ask my doctor.

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