ahhhhhh
10:23 a.m. on September 13, 2006


I am feeling extreme anxiety. My Dad arrives tonight and we still have so much to do around the house in preparation for guests. I was a bit frantic this morning trying to clean the bathtub before getting ready for work. I was already semi-hyperventilating but for some reason decided to have twice the coffee I usually have.

On my drive to work it was raining ever-so-slightly, which means someone driving like an idiot crashed into multiple cars ensuring a traffic back-up of tremendous proportions. While inching along on the highway at one mile per hour, I felt it, that undeniable pressure of a full bladder. My bladder can only hold approximately 15 fluid ounces (yes, I have measured). I probably drank about 14 ounces of coffee & then whatever extra saliva all my anxiety was producing was tipping the bladder scale into dire proportions. I began looking at the faces of the other drivers and pleading: “Please hurry, I have to PEEEE.”

As we inched along I became more and more frantic. After far too long, I finally exited the freeway and headed for the parking garage of my workplace; I was doing anxious kegel exercises like you would not believe. I cried out in agony & desperation. Could I make it up the stairs to finally use my work toilet? The answer was no. If I tried that then I would have to drive all the way home again for a fresh pair of trousers. I knew what had to be done. I drove down to the lowest level of the parking garage where I calculated there would be less chance of another person there at that moment. I parked my car near a wall, got out and positioned myself between my car and said wall and hoped upon hope that a business man would not suddenly walk around the corner and catch me with my pants down evacuating a good 18 ounces. Disgusting, yes, but the relief is outstanding.





Space Holder. - February 12, 2012

BEAUTIFUL BOY - August 26, 2011

COUNTDOWN - July 13, 2011

SEXAY - June 16, 2011

BACKWARDS AND FORWARDS - May 30, 2011

paleo neo